Unexpected Liberation

 
Sunday, May 08, 2005

Yes, As a matter of fact…

I did fall off the face of the earth. It was an amazing journey!

It all began about a month ago. I woke up in my usual manner, groggy but still my amazingly cheerful self, and began my day with four slices of cinnamon toast and a nice glass of cold Dr. Pepper.

The memo holder next to my computer held an ominous url in its clutches. Our insurance company’s website of “in network” health providers. My only task was to find a doctor for my son that lived with-in a 10 mile radius, make an appointment and find the help he so desperately needed. Piece of cake, yes?

Piece of cake, no. Most of the phone numbers did not lead to a nice little office with a nice little reservation taking employee. These numbers went directly to doctor’s pagers where you could leave a detailed message and never have your call returned. I have a list of about 15 doctors in the Pittsburgh area that aren’t professional enough to return a phone call if anyone is interested.

Then there is the clinic where my son’s last evaluation took place in February. We found out (on our own because the clinic wouldn’t take the time to follow up) after the evaluation that our insurance wouldn’t cover his therapy and care. We have requested a copy of the evaluation by mail, phone and fax. Nothing.

These things are just the tip of the iceberg and I will not bore you with the full details. Needless to say, I have been obsessed and not much in the mood to talk about it. Dealing with it is enough.

There have been many high-notes in the past month. My husband and I stumbled onto an opportunity to take “Swing” dance lessons for four weeks…for free! Free was the operative word for me because I have never danced a day in my life (in public) An upcoming class reunion in June featuring a dinner/dance as the main event have made dance classes seem like a reasonable idea.

The first night I thought I was going to die. I am not an active person, per se. Walking from my computer to the refrigerator or bathroom makes up my daily exercise routine. I want to do more. It is just SO BORING. I can’t say that about the dance classes. After getting past the initial embarrassment of not knowing my left from my right foot ( a piece of knowledge that continues to plague me the first 20 minutes of class each week) I start having fun. I have to take several breaks through out the class because my leg muscles eventually just go limp. But, I have noticed more stamina each week after the class and I have finally gotten “out of self” and found myself just enjoying the experience.

I can’t say that we’ll impress anyone at the reunion but frankly, that wasn’t my goal in the first place.

As the reunion approaches you’ll be receiving an earful on the subject so that’s all I have to say about it for now. Trust me, I’m doing you a favor.

Last weekend I spent three whole days without the internet. It wasn’t by choice. My friend Sally and I drove up to Erie, PA for a Toastmasters Spring Conference. The AVALON HOTEL in Erie boasts on their website that they have wireless internet throughout the hotel. LIAR, LIAR, PANTS ON FIRE! There was NO internet. I called down to the main desk when my laptop didn’t hook up with a wireless provider in my room.
There wasn’t even visible evidence of a data port. Do you know what they told me? DO YOU? I was to unplug the telephone and plug my modem in to the phone jack. OR, I could go down to the lobby where “wireless sometimes drift in.” It does? From where? Lake Erie? Does a seagull fly overhead with a connection on his ass?

Several of my cohorts and I tried out various areas of the lobby and not a single one ever linked up to anything.

In the long run it turned out okay. It forced me to find something to do the night before the conference. Sally and I wound up in a great comedy club right up the street called Juniors Last Laugh. Our table was right next to the stage. All three comedians were great but the headliner, Mark Reedy, was the best. The guy before him was named Buzz Nutley. Very funny guy. How could you go wrong with a name like Buzz Nutley?

On Sunday after the conference we drove over to North Tonawanda, NY. Sallie is a master breeder of tropical fish and apparently “The Fish Place” is THE place to check out fish. I have all sorts of pictures I took with my cell phone and the minute I figure out how in the hell to get them from my phone to the computer I will share them with you. I have a very cool picture of two morey eels among others. We spent three hours in that fish store. I would tell you about the secret basement that is about three times bigger than the store but I have been sworn to secrecy. (Don’t worry, I have pictures of that too!)
We departed with two large Styrofoam containers filled with assorted fish stuffed into the back of her Prius. (A Prius is a car – you sicko!)

As we were finally leaving the store I found out we were only 11 miles from Niagra Falls. There was no way I was going to be that close and not go. I dreamed of seeing Niagra Falls since I was a little girl growing up in Oklahoma. I always hoped to see it with my husband the first time but as I said…there was no way I was going to miss it when I was just eleven miles away!

Sallie is a trooper plus she owed me big time for my angelic patience at The Fish Place. We arrived at the Falls around 5 pm. I gladly paid the 10.00 for parking. We donned our jackets and took out on foot to the Falls. I cried. I really did. They are absolutely magnificent. All that power really puts you in your place. I took lots of pictures. I even emailed one to my husband (don’t ask me how I did that …I just followed the prompts that I now can’t find. No, I am not a complete idiot. I just got this damn thing two weeks ago) I can’t wait to go back and visit the Canadian side. That will be another big deal for me since I have never been outside of the U.S. But I could look across the rapids and see Canada…!

So, that is a few of the ways I spent my time while fallen off the face of the earth. Some of it has been frustrating, some of it fun, some of it life altering.

Maybe I’ll fall off again next year.

Vic set it free at 11:28 AM

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